Join A Group That Meets Regularly

Making a specific list will also allow you to recognize and identify if someone you meet has the qualities you are looking for. It could also mean that you’d prefer a wealthy partner or someone who makes a lot of money each year. Or successful might also imply that your partner has a lot of friends, is happy with his or her life and job, or is optimistic about the future and has a clear set of goals and accomplishments. These are all very different definitions of the word successful, and, depending on which definition you go with, you’ll end up with very different people who’d possess very different qualities. The big message here is that being specific makes you question the true qualities you want in a partner. Then, once you have your list of qualities, share your list with a friend or family member. Use your friends or family as a sounding board, get their reactions and comments, and then revise your list accordingly. Listen to their feedback about why a specific quality may not be best for you. After your revisions are complete, keep your list close to you so you can read, review, and revise it regularly. Make a List and Check It Twice Defining the type of person you want to be with is a little like making a shopping list before you head out to the grocery store. It streamlines the process, keeps you from making random choices, and helps you to not waste time. To start, grab a piece of paper and divide it into two columns.

You Can't Do That

This piece of paper will become your these are the qualities I must have in my new partner personal shopping list. Does the person’s age or physical appearance matter? What about their ethnicity or cultural background? Do they share any of your key life values? In the left column, list characteristics that first come to mind. Then, in the right column, refine each characteristic to be specific to you. For example, if you’ve listed healthy and fit on the left, you might refine this to exercises daily, is active, plays sports, eats healthily, or isn’t overweight on the right. The right column should be the qualities you would be able to recognize or see if you met the perfect partner. Once you’ve written and refined your list and have checked it twice, circle the top fifteen qualities that are most important to you. Remember, you need to limit your list to fifteen qualities, so make sure you prioritize. Instead, many seniors rank an adventurous travel companion at the top of their lists, because they now have more time to travel than they did in their younger working days. In fact, in a survey by OurTime.com, Match.com’s online dating site for boomers aged fifty and up, 85 percent of respondents wanted a significant other who liked to travel, and 46 percent listed being adventuresome as the most desirable characteristic in a companion. Right will make you happy, and if he or she has your best interests at heart.

Outside Looking In

Don’t Be Afraid to Put Physical Qualities on Your List Studies from all over the world find that physical attractiveness, particularly when people first meet, is very important to both men and women. Men have no problem admitting that a physically attractive partner is important to them. However, it’s important to point out that these qualities still make the list! Research shows that we often end up with partners who are as attractive as we are. They include views on money, family and children, faith and spirituality, careers, health and fitness, and your general outlook on life. Sharing similar key life values with a partner will help your relationship to flourish and grow. In your past relationship, you may have put yourself last. Put yourself first and become the person you’ve always wanted to be. Doing so will make you happier now and in your next relationship. Focusing on your desires, interests, likes, and needs will help you to discover the type of person who’s right for you. Hundreds of people have used it to find compatible partners, and you will, too! Like a dedicated athlete, you have spent weeks or months becoming that person you always wanted to be, and now you’re ready to start a new relationship with your eyes wide open, your heart sure, and your mind clear of other people’s ideas. I’ll provide secrets and tips on how to successfully use online dating and social networking to find smart, emotionally healthy people who share your values. When you think about the dating scene, how do you feel? I can assure you that dating, as daunting as it may seem right now, is absolutely worth the effort.

From Small Things Big Things Come

If they can do it, so can you! You’ve done all of the hard work already, and it’s now time to get down to the business of finding your new love. Where do I start? It may have been years or even decades since you’ve dated, and just thinking about it may be completely overwhelming. Should you head to a bar? Let your friends fix you up? Contrary to popular belief, the best place to meet someone is not at a bar or party. 20 percent met at school or in an educational program. 17 percent met in public places, like grocery stories, libraries, or parks. 14 percent met at work. 8 percent lived near each other. Let’s look at each of these dating methods, one by one, to understand why they work and how you can make them work for you. One of the top ways to find new love is to join a group that meets often or to participate in a group activity on a regular basis. Are you actively involved in an ongoing political cause? Activity that involves meeting and spending regular time with people who have similar interests can easily set the stage for new love. Try a Cooking Class! Why not get in on the fun and join a cooking class?