Know When To Give A Proper Response

Being a better listener requires that you listen more often than you speak. So, we have examined the approaches to an effective listening skill that you need to know and learn, what happens when you fail to listen, and we have also examined the challenge or problem about listening. Next, we shall critically examine what you can do to manage the challenge, or what steps you can follow to become a good listener. To be a better listener in your relationship, you should pay complete attention to your partner whenever they have something to talk about with you. Sometimes, your partner may want to talk with you about an issue but your mind may be on other things at that moment. If so, do not pretend to listen. If possible, put aside what you are doing and give your spouse or partner your complete attention, or you could ask your partner to wait until you are able to give them your full attention. When it’s time for you to listen to your partner or spouse, please give them your undivided attention, be present and focused on the discussion. For example, if your phone would cause a distraction, then, by all means, turn off the ringer or turn the phone face down to avoid any possible distraction. This will pull you away from being present in the moment with your partner. When it is your turn to listen, do not interrupt your partner who is speaking, also, it would do a lot of good if you could resist the urge to disagree instead of listening to the speaker. You will get your turn to speak.

The First Thing You Give

For now, just, pay attention fully and listen to your partner, you will get your chance. Active listening is not just a technique, active listening is an expression of love. When you have a sincere interest in what your partner and what they are talking to you about, listening becomes less forced and more natural. In this way you are look out for your partner’s interests, not just for your own. When you have a conversation with your spouse, you should view the discussion as a collaborative experience by doing your best to listen from the perspective of your partner’s viewpoint with the intention to bring about a resolution. See if you can put yourself objectively in their shoes to help you better understand their feelings, thoughts, and perspective. Taking things personally makes it easier for you to think that all that your partner is saying is all about you. You should let go of the thought that all the talk is about you. This can be one of the more difficult parts of listening because it’s human nature to take things personally. When you do, you would find yourself thinking that what your spouse is saying is somehow making you wrong. Try to remember that your partner is communicating their personal experience, which, in reality, may or may not have anything to do with you. Ask questions when an issue seems vague so you do not misunderstand and then misinterpret.

Are You Listening?

When you ask questions, you show that you are following in on what your partner is saying and you will be better able to understand whatever they are saying. Do not tune out or walk away from the conversation without regard to your partner, even if what you are hearing does not please you. For example, your spouse may be criticizing you. Keep listening and give genuine consideration to what your partner is saying. This requires a reasonable measure of maturity, but it pays off. Listen for the Message, Not Just the Words. Pay attention to the message that is conveyed by body language, eye movement, and tone of voice. Perhaps, you are the one doing more of the talking that you forget how to listen. No harm will come to you if you lower your pride and lengthen your patience long enough to just listen to what your mate has to say. Once you train yourself to listen more often, it will come naturally when you are having a conversation with your wife, husband, boyfriend, or girlfriend. We have always said that communication is not one way. Communication requires that when one person talks the other person listens.

Between Two Worlds

These roles are interchanged every now and then. The conflict or misunderstanding arises when these roles are not exchanged at all and only one partner does all the talking and only one partner listens. It is important for you to know when to stop talking. Effective communication can never be achieved if these roles are not constantly interchanged between two partners in a relationship. It is not a good idea to discuss with someone who shows that he or she is not interested in the discussion. To be a good listener, you cannot just sit there and look at your partner, you have to show that you are eager and keen. To show keenness or enthusiasm, you may start by initiating a conversation or look for ways to expand a conversation. But if you are clearly not in the mood to talk, then it is fine to clearly indicate to your partner that you are not in the right state to have an intelligible discussion. To be enhancing your listening skill, you have to be responsive, have to know when to give a response and you also have to give a proper response. Your communication is not effective when your partner is talking and you are merely nodding or shaking your head. If you are a good listener you will be able to answer correspondingly whatever question is you are asked because you are listening well. Sometimes, simply saying yes or no may not be sufficient enough to answer a subject matter. Do my actions show that I view my relationship or marriage with my partner as more important than my work or my various hobbies? What kind of time does my partner get from me?