Enlightenment Is A Journey

What if I had made different choices? Don’t worry about what everyone else is doing. We like straight lines because we can see what’s ahead of us. The unknown can be scary. Inner work is not easy. But unless you put in the effort, you won’t value what you’ve worked so hard for. You might be a diamond in the rough, but remember, you’re still a diamond. Never is always wrong. Always is never right. When in doubt, remember who you are. What is not expressed is depressed. Inquire within, engage with others. Your heart knows only truth.

Enough Is Enough

The thing that is most true will be the simplest, most obvious thing. The moments that are good and true are signs of the divine. Growing up, I wished I could be anywhere else but where I was. Other people’s lives seemed better than mine. Looking outward was easier. What if I had grown up in a nicer part of town? What if I had a different body? What if I hadn’t grown up where I did? With all those years of study and practice, fear is very much a skill I mastered. When I’m on my morning run, I worry that someone could run me over. When I’m in bed watching my favorite show, I think about how someone could break in and kill me, my partner, Torry, and the dogs. When I travel, I imagine the airplane crashing even as I dunk my tea bag in hot water and stare at a beautiful sunrise. When I’m sitting outside staring at my orange tree, I catch a glimpse of the cracks in the concrete and think, The big one could happen any day now. A tiny surge of electricity runs through my chest as I begin to panic. Google to see what kind of illness my symptoms are corroborating.

The Longest Time

I give myself just enough panic to jump out of my chair and say, I’m having a heart attack. I live my life wondering, When will the next shoe drop? It can all end in an instant. These are all valid fears, but I find that they are most prevailing when things are going well. Congratulations, you are well on your way to making it through another difficult day of being human. Your life is going well. Life is hard and, let’s be honest, sometimes it can turn quickly. Waking hours can drag on. Days that move into weeks turn into months. Years pass stealthily as you celebrate big birthdays, anniversaries, and life’s fleeting milestones. Then one day, it’s over. We spend so much time filling the void of space and time with things, tasks, and lists that, in the grand scheme of life, don’t really matter. However, putting things into perspective allows you to reach for more of what’s important, for things that matter most.

Remember To Forget

It helps us remember what we are doing here. So, how do we discern what matters? Discernment is the ability to recognize and distinguish the difference between two or more things for the purpose of choosing what serves your highest good. Living a life in constant fear is exhausting. I learned all about living in fear while growing up in East Los Angeles. It was normal because it happened just outside our door. So much of my worldview was shaped by the normalization of fear. I also thought everyone broke the law at some point and that being in the juvenile detention system was a rite of passage. I didn’t know that there were any other options on the menu. I didn’t even know there was a menu. I’m not posting enough. I go through hundreds of pictures trying to find the right landscape or the right inspirational quote. I’ve come a long way from worrying about gunshots going through our apartment. Social media has become such a prevalent part of our lives. We feel lost and unable to feel loved and genuinely connected. The fact is that we do matter, and we don’t need anyone outside of ourselves to validate that. We allow misinformation into our psyches without thought or question because it appears on YouTube accounts with millions of views and in posts with clickable headlines. We have been trained to believe the extraordinary to placate our dissatisfaction with the mundane. We feel more separated from each other than ever before. We are more concerned with being right than being kind. I love social media, make no mistake. It is a great tool, just like everything else, for feeling more connection, but I noticed how much it made me focus on what is not happening in my life, as opposed to what is. It’s our duty to discern whether it’s serving our highest self or causing a bigger disconnect from who and what we truly are. Becoming acutely aware of how this is affecting us becomes our most vital challenge, helping us identify what afflictions are being activated and why. The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali by Sri Swami Satchidananda discusses five major blocks to the path of enlightenment, as understood by both Buddhist and Hindu traditions. These are known as the five afflictions of the mind, or the five kleshas. They are ignorance, egoism, attachment, aversion, and fear of death. The afflictions are known to build character and make us stronger, but sometimes life just punches you in the face. That’s what yoga and meditation are for. I got a black eye once, and it didn’t hurt as much as facing my fears. Yogic has been passed down for thousands of years, and it makes as much sense today as it did at any other time in history. You came to the right place. I am here to tell you that you are not alone. I see you, and I’ve been there too. Any insecurity or character defects would dissipate in a puffy cloud of sage and the rest would burn away in a hot yoga room. My route to enlightenment would be seamless.