Sleep Is A Natural Process

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How do we reframe frustration about being awake in the middle of the night? I want you to imagine this color in all its aspects with each breath in and each breath out. Notice if it’s bright or if it’s muted. Notice if it’s inside or outside. Notice if it’s light or dense. Allow this color that your unconscious mind has chosen for healing and relaxation to move through any tension in your body, to move through any stagnation in your body. And notice what happens as the color of healing and relaxation moves through any tension and stagnation in your body. Notice this color perhaps dissipating the tension in your body. Welcome this color and energy frequency that your unconscious mind has chosen to help your body restore and relax. This is your healing color for right now. Just watch as you breathe in and out. Notice how this color soothes your body as you breathe. What does it feel like to allow yourself to slip into the color of relaxation with each breath in and each breath out? Just sinking into the color of relaxation and restoration.

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It's Too Late

Perhaps if it feels right, allow yourself to sink into a deep, restorative sleep now. And know that you will wake when it is time, feeling restored and refreshed. For one thing, it’s pretty fascinating how much you can tune in to when you are up in the middle of night and cannot fall back to sleep right away. During such times, I seem to be able to hear every single sound with extreme clarity, as if I had sonar tracking. While you might not expect to hear birdsong in the urban jungle of New York City, when I moved across the river from Manhattan to Queens, I suddenly found myself hearing birdsong. My apartment is relatively quiet, since it faces the interior courtyard and the backyards of adjoining buildings. And somehow, there is one bird that sings in the middle of the night when it seems like no other living thing is stirring. The sound of this one solitary bird chirping in the dark of night is irritating, but if I allow myself to be present with the sound, it can feel unexpected and maybe even joyful. Reframing our feelings about insomnia and sleeplessness is easier said than done. Perhaps the insomnia is helping you to learn more deeply about yourself. If you find yourself awake in the middle of the night, first and foremost, acknowledge any feelings of frustration, irritation, or stress. Then take a slow, gentle breath in and an even slower exhale out.

Give Up the Ghost

And, although it will probably be your first instinct, do not look at the time. The mind is truly fascinating. Did you know there is something known as learned insomnia? It’s basically what happens when someone might have a bout of insomnia and then becomes preoccupied with their sleep. By worrying about sleep, we exacerbate the issue. If a behavior is learned, then it can also be unlearned. One might begin to utilize awareness to start to break the cycle. Recognize when you are worried about sleep. Recognize if devices to help track sleep are actually helpful or perhaps hurtful by increasing anxiety. Remember that sleep is a natural process. Remind yourself that sleep is as effortless as breath. In the same way that breath happens on its own, sleep also happens on its own. And if it’s not happening right now, that’s okay.

Too Little, Too Late

Sleep is a natural process, like breath, and requires no doing on your part. What you can do is acknowledge all that you are feeling and simply breathe. Here are several practices for when you are up in the middle of the night. Cultivate patience as you do these practices and don’t force yourself to fall back to sleep. Or maybe it will take a little bit longer. But, in either case, do some of these relaxing techniques instead of tossing and turning. In my experience, if you can let go of expectation and just allow yourself to give the practices a go, they will work. Here’s a guided meditation you can read slowly, one sentence at time. Close your eyes and breathe long and deep in between each sentence. You know what’s worse than waking up in the middle of night? Trying to get back to sleep. Let go of that thought. This is a perfect time for meditation. A time to go within. To just meet yourself where you are. To just be with your breath. Just notice the natural rise and fall of your chest as breath moves in and as breath moves out. Just notice the sensation of air. Air flowing through your nostrils as breath moves in and as breath moves out. There’s nothing to do here. No trying to go back to sleep. No trying to fall back into sleep. Just being here with your breath. Just being as you are with whatever it is you are feeling and not wishing for it to be any other way than what it is. To unwind whatever is keeping you up and not falling back to sleep. There’s a certain comfort in just being. Stop trying to do anything. Whatever thoughts are floating in, whatever feelings or emotions are floating in, just allowing them to be as they are. By doing nothing, you might notice that they float as quickly in as they float out. There’s a natural rhythm to your breath. Just allowing yourself to flow with the natural rhythm that is your breath. The breath that flows in and the breath that flows out. The breath that flows into being and the breath that floats out of being. Nothing to do but just be. Resting in the fluidness of your breath. Resting in the fluidness of your being. Resting awhile as deeply and fluidly as you breathe. And if you find yourself drifting into sleep, you can welcome in feelings of comfort and ease.